10/11/11

China Conquers the United States of America

SHORTLY AFTER 8AM EDT ON A NOT TOO DISTANT DAY ALL COMMERCIAL BROADCASTING OUTLETS IN THE UNITED STATES AND CANADA WENT OFF THE AIR FOR SOME 30 MINUTES.  WHEN THE SIGNALS WERE RESTORED ALL STATIONS CARRIED THE SAME MESSAGE AND IMAGE:
AS THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF CHINA'S FLAG WAS SEEN ON EVERY TV SCREEN IN AMERICA A CALM, REASSURING VOICE WAS HEARD SPEAKING PERFECT ENGLISH TELLING ALL AMERICANS TO BE CALM AND THAT NO GREAT CHANGES WOULD COME INTO THEIR LIVES.  FIRST THE VOICE PROCLAIMED THAT THE COUNTRY'S BELOVED PRESIDENT, BARACK OBAMA WOULD REMAIN IN OFFICE AND THAT  ALL AMERICANS WOULD HAVE JOBS BECAUSE THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC WAS FORGIVING AMERICA'S FOREIGN DEBT AND IMMEDIATELY PLEDGING 4 TRILLION DOLLARS TO REBUILD AMERICA'S CRUMBLING INTRASTRUCTURE THEREBY PUTTING OVER 13 MILLION PEOPLE TO WORK WITHIN THE MONTH.  ALL WOULD HAVE FREE EDUCATION INCLUDING HIGHER EDUCATION.  THE VOICE PROCLAIMED THAT NO PERSON WOULD GO HUNGRY IN THE NEW AMERICA AND THAT ALL CITIZENS WOULD HAVE ACCESS TO FREE HEALTH CARE. NEXT MILLIONAIRES AND BILLIONAIRES WOULD HAVE THEIR MONEY AND PROPERTY CONFISCATED AND REDISTRIBUTED TO THE PEOPLE.  SHELTER WOULD BE PROVIDED TO THE HOMELESS IN THOSE SPACIOUS HOMES OF THE RICH. FREE ELECTIONS WOULD CONTINUE AND BE OPEN TO THOSE POLITICAL PARTIES THAT SUPPORT "PEOPLES RIGHTS AND WEALTH REDISTRIBUTION".  ALL FIREARMS MUST BE TURNED IN TO THOSE IN AUTHORITY FOR THE PUBLIC GOOD AND FOR PUBLIC SAFETY.  RELIGIOUS FREEDOMS WILL BE ALLOWED AND EVEN ENCOURAGED, BUT NOT IN PUBLIC PLACES.  ALL PRIVATELY OWNED BANKS AND CORPORATIONS WOULD BE PUT UNDER GOVERNMENT CONTROL SO THEY COULD BETTER SERVE THE PEOPLE'S NEEDS.  THE NYC STOCK EXCHANGE WOULD BE CLOSED TO PROTECT THE PUBLIC FROM INDIVIDUAL GREED. FINALLY THE REASSURING VOICE STATED THAT AMERICA COULD  KEEP ITS FLAG ALTHOUGH THE MILITARY WOULD BE DISBANDED AND REPLACED WITH A VOLUNTEER FORCE TO ASSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITY. 

MOST IN THE COUNTRY WERE SHOCKED AND STRICKEN WITH GRIEF, BUT SOME, MORE THAT ONE MIGHT EXPECT CHEERED THE NEW ORDER.  YES THOSE ON THE AMERICAN LEFT HAD ACHIEVED THEIR GOALS AND THERE WAS JOY ON THE STREETS OF SAN FRANCISCO AND THE BERKELEY CAMPUS.  ELSEWHERE THERE WERE WHISPERS OF BETRAYAL.  HAD SOMEONE ORDERED AMERICA'S ARMED FORCES TO STAND DOWN?  HAD THE PRESIDENT SEEING HIS PROSPECTS OF RE-ELECTION DIMMED DECIDED THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY TO ACHIEVE HIS AGENDA?  QUESTIONS WITHOUT ANSWERS AS THE NATIONAL ANTHEM PLAYED ON ALL CHANNELS.  YES THE FLAG WAS STILL THERE AS FRANCIS SCOTT KEY WROTE LONG AGO, BUT THE FREEDOMS THAT WENT WITH IT WERE GONE!!!!!!

OBAMA WOKE EARLY ON THE MORNING OF NOVEMBER 7, 2012 AND THOUGHT "WHAT A DREAM" BUT THEN THE REALITY OF THE DAY SUDDENLY HIT HIM, THE NIGHT BEFORE HE HAD GONE DOWN TO DEFEAT IN A LANDSIDE ELECTION AND WAS NOW A "LAME DUCK".  SLOWLY HE REACHED FOR THE PHONE ON THE NIGHT STAND NEXT TO HIS BED AND CALLED HIS SECERTARY IN THE OFFICE BELOW.  THE VOICE ON THE OTHER END SAID, "MR PRESIDENT, HOW MAY I HELP YOU"?  OBAMA IS A CALM VOICE REPLIED, "GET ME THE CHINESE PREMIER"!  HE DREAM WAS OVER, BUT THE NIGHTMARE HAD BEGUN.
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